Benjamin Matthew Woolley

If you know me, you've heard me talk about Jenni and Ben many times before.  Jenni has been a huge support system for me throughout our fertility and now adoption journey.  Our paths are similar yet very different as all stories are.  I've admired her grace, strength and most of all her faith throughout her journey to Ben.  And Ben... We'll, he is just the most precious baby boy who warms your heart every time you look at him.  He is my signal of hope.  The day he was born will be a day I will never forget for two reasons.  One, it was March 17th, the day our baby was supposed to be 'conceived' through IVF.  And two, March 17th was a long awaited dream come true for Rusty and Jenni.  Their journey was over and Ben, the baby God always intended for them, was born.  I'll never forget talking to Jenni the following morning and she telling me that Ben was finally here.  I joked that our baby could have been conceived on the same day as her baby was born.  How amazing would that have been?  My other line beeped while we were talking and it was Dr. Dunn only to tell me that my eggs unexpectedly disintegrated; a roadblock none of us could have foreseen and we wouldn't be able to have a biological child.  This was the most devastating time in my life to date.  But, every time Ben has a monthly 'birthday', I don't think about that time in my life, I think about our future.  I think about how one day we will be celebrating these milestones with our baby; the baby that God always intended for us.

  

Ben is my signal of hope. 

I'm thrilled beyond words to say that Jenni and Rusty's journey to Ben is officially complete.  Yesterday, they were declared by a judge at their adoption finalization as a forever family.  Benjamin Matthew is officially what we have always known him as - a Woolley.  

Kris and I were honored to have been a part of this very special day in their family's life.  It was a very happy and emotional day for everyone involved.  

I just love this one. Such a happy and loving family. 

I see a mom that is so proud of her son, Rusty.

  

I just love seeing all of these smiles. 

Those are all happy tears. I don't think there was a dry eye in our crowd.

The judge gave Ben a stuffed animal. I'm sure if will be a forever keepsake. 

The Woolley Family!

Rusty, Jenni and Ben with their families. 

Benjamin Matthew Woolley - could you be any cuter?!

I love this sign Jenni made. 

This is Erica, Jenni's best friend and saving grace.

You can see how much love Aunt Erica has for Ben. So incredibly sweet. 

This is my favorite picture of the day.  I see so much love and happiness between three very special people.

Either poor Ben's ears are bothering him or he's a huge Mickey Mouse fan. I think both. 

Jenni - I can't thank you enough for sharing your life and your journey with me.  Without your story, your support and your love, I wouldn't be half as strong as I am today (I’d be in therapy that’s for sure!).  I’m so thankful God made us neighbors – He sure knew what He was doing!  We love you guys and are so grateful for your friendship and all the ways in which you have been there for us.  

Congratulations Woolley family!

Happy Thanksgiving!

“When we lose one blessing, another is often most unexpectedly given in its place”

~C.S. Lewis

This year I’m most thankful for every unexpected blessing in my life.  I may not appreciate or even understand them at first, but over time I've realized that out of each trial we experienced, came a blessing.  And I’m grateful for each and every one. 

Happy Thanksgiving!  

Happy 'Friendsgiving'!

On Sunday, we had our very first Thanksgiving with friends that one couple coined 'Friendsgiving'.  I like it.  'Friendsgiving' is a start to a new tradition that Kris and I will now look forward to every year.  Twelve of us squeezed around our dining room table (room for 8 normally) shared great conversation, flowing wine and who could forget the delicious meal prepared by all who attended.  It was a wonderful night and we even got to celebrate my hubby's soon-to-be 29th birthday.  Thank you all for coming and for your generosity.  Kris and I are thankful for each and every one of your friendships. 

I had plans of taking pictures of everyone throughout the night, but after everyone showed up, there was lots of visiting, preparing the meal, enjoying a glass of wine (or two!) myself and well...the camera got forgotten.  But, I have before pictures!

 

Here we sang Kris 'Happy Birthday' and someone reminded me to grab my camera. But  it was too late...

With a baby in hand and at the very last second I got two crummy photos of the night with no one 's face in it.  Oh well.  I had the fixed 50mm lens on and no room or time to adjust.  

It's officially Kris' birthday week and I have 2, possibly 3, other celebratory days in store for him and more photo ops to come.  I will remember to capture those memories. 

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!
Enjoy the holiday with your families and cherish those sweet memories. 

Happy National Adoption Month!

For those of you who don’t know, November is National Adoption Month.  I’ve been meaning to post something regarding this very special topic, but between planning an adoption event for Gladney, planning our own Thanksgiving with friends this month and lots of life happening in between; I’ve been a little busy.  It’s only November 21^st, so I made it just in time!

A friend recently shared with me this blog, 30 Adoption Portraits in 30 Days and I think it’s the perfect way to not only educate those unaware of the many different perspectives of adoption, but also celebrate the miracle of adoption.  You can read the adoption stories of birth parents, adoptees, adoptive parents and waiting adoptive parents just like us.  Reading these stories may give you chills, these stories may bring tears to your eyes, but in the end, families are formed and that should leave you with a smile. 


30 Adoption Portraits in 30 Days

Nov. 1: The Waiting is the Hardest Part by Merrin Donahue
Nov. 2: Lost Connections by An Anonymous Birthmother
Nov. 3: Being the Adopted Kid by Kim Wilkes
Nov. 4: An Unpredictable Journey of Faith by Debbie Mumm
Nov. 5: I Drove Home Without Her by Jill Barber
Nov. 6: We Nearly Decided To Give Up by Rob Duval
Nov. 7: Adoption Would Protect Her by G, birthmother
Nov. 8: If Not Me, Then Who? by Dawn Berger
Nov. 9: I Found Out I Was Adopted Because of Facebook by Andrew Cadieux
Nov. 10: I Had Missed the Call by Cathy J.
Nov. 11: Pain Among Beauty by Gretchen Helgeson
Nov. 12: The Lifelong Detective: Still searching for my birth family by Marian Rogers
Nov. 13: What Dreams May Come by Diana Perrone
Nov. 14: Katie's Custody Day: A Strong Girl from the Start by Carrie Goldman
Nov. 15: Real Life, Not the TV Version by Kat Szmit
Nov. 16: A Strange Bird Cry Announces Our Daughter by Jeremy Cressman
Nov. 17: My Oldest Daughter And I Shared Our First Hug by Amy Conn
Nov. 18: Afraid of Being Left Behind by Melissa Miller
Nov. 19: The Reality Started to Set In That I Was Never Going to Be Pregnant Again by Jodie Tallman
Nov. 20: When the Name "Mother" Has Multiple Meanings by Sarah Werthan Buttenwieser
Nov. 21: A Cast-Aside Child Comes Home by Alice Bengel
Nov. 22: Where Are The Babies? by Jennifer Allwood
Nov. 23: Could I Open My Heart to Trying Adoption Again? by Deb Bart
Nov. 24: He Can Make You Smile Even On Your Worst Day by Josh Graham
Nov. 25: Not All Adoptees Find a Happy Home? by "Rachel"
Nov. 26: We Are Not Complete by Dana at Life Unexpected
Nov. 27: I Had To Do What Was Best For All Of My Children by M, Katie's Birthmother
Nov. 28: An Adoption Postcard From My Side of the Edge by Kim Strickland
Nov. 29: The Big Problem Facing Foster-to-Adopt Families by Betsy White
Nov. 30: When Adoptive Family + Birth Families = Happiness by Collen Walsh

Shopping for Baby

Yesterday, my mom and I set out to purchase the baby bedding and crib mattress for Baby Simpson.  We have had both picked out for some time, but Nest and Cot (the store we purchased from) mentioned last month that we should wait to purchase the items if we can and use the Holiday Card.  If you don’t know what the holiday card is, look no further.  You can purchase this card for a minimum donation of $70 to the American Cancer Society and with that you can save 20% or more at hundreds of stores in the Houston and surrounding areas.  It really is a glorious card.  

Anyway, one trip to Nest and Cot to purchase the bedding and crib mattress led to a mini shopping spree for Baby Simpson.  I just couldn’t help myself!  After all, I’ve been waiting for over two years now to shop, plan and prepare for our baby’s arrival and now the time is finally here.  

Baby's new mattress

The boys had a little fun in there!

I really hope our baby is not allergic to doggies or I'm in t.r.o.u.b.l.e. 

George liked it so much he needed a rest. 

Oskar is into everything that we buy for his future brother or sister. 

Here are a few of the new baby clothes that I purchased for our baby.  It is extremely difficult to find gender neutral clothes, but I tried my best.  Really I just want to have a few things so that if we get a call and only have a moments notice to pick up our baby, I want to be as ready as I can be.  That's the plan anyway...

This one is my favorite - they are mini Oskars!

Baby's 1st UT gear!

I’ve walked upstairs no less than five times to look at those baby clothes today alone and last night while Kris was in Canada for work, he jokingly told me not to sleep in the crib now that we have a mattress.  Can you tell I’m excited?! 

And now, we wait.

I’ve been writing for our adoption for the past 4 months. It all started with a simple questionnaire to apply to The Gladney Center for Adoption. After we were accepted and attended orientation, we had to fill out an application, seems redundant, but it wasn’t. This application was for our home study and was a thick stack of documents filled with our autobiographies, a statement of faith, an income summary, our health history, birth parent matching opportunities and so on… We made tabs for each type of document and we made it to Tab W. This application encompassed every aspect of our life that you could imagine.

Remember this post?

After the application was completed, then it was time for the home study. This meant writing out answers to questions we knew we would be asked. We aren’t people who just ‘wing’ things; we prepare and over-prepare for everything. We learned during our home study process, both the interview and the home visit, that over-preparing goes a long way. Both processes went by smoothly and best of all quickly.

After our home study came the writing of our profile book. If I thought I was tired of writing for our adoption before then, well, I certainly am now. I had NO idea the pressures and importance of every word I wrote until I dove into writing about our life. You don’t want to say too much, but you also don’t want to say too little. You want to say the ‘right’ words and simple words that appeal to all ages. It was a large task that didn’t end with the writing.

And just when I thought I was finally done writing for our adoption, what do you know – there’s more! I then found out I had to write or shorten a version of our profile book for our web pages that Gladney completes for us. We send the text, 25 pictures and a completed questionnaire of all of our favorite things and they put together our web profiles. As of today, we are on two websites and by tomorrow we will be on a third.

We have officially completed all the paperwork, documentation and profiles for our adoption! And now, we wait, educate ourselves on adoption as much as we can and prepare ourselves for bringing home a baby just as any expectant parents would.

We have been told by our caseworker that it could be 6-9 months until our profile book is shown to a birthparent.  No one is certain on the time frame, but she is setting our expectations realistically.  This was very hard for Kris and I to hear, much less fathom, so we decided to be proactive and take a step of our own to reach out to birth families.  Kris came up with the idea of making business cards and I loved the idea, but I told him to run with it. I was and really am now, over writing for our adoption – I mean, it’s been 4 months! I think he did an amazing job and I’m so thankful to him for creating this opportunity for us. Who knows, his idea could one day lead to a tiny blessing in our arms…
Here is the card he created and a little message from my sweet hubby:

Ashley and I wanted to ask each of you, our friends and family, for your help with something that's very near and dear to us. As many of you know, we are absolutely excited to adopt our first child and begin our new family. We have been working with a domestic adoption agency over the last few months and are now officially approved - which means we now wait to be chosen by a birth mother. This may take a few weeks or a few years - it's completely out of our control. So in the meantime, we are reaching out to our friends and family to keep us in mind if you should hear of a birth mother considering placing a newborn child for adoption. Our adoption agency is one of the oldest in the nation and is able to place children for adoption in almost any state in the U.S. The agency can also provide the birth mother with counseling, housing, and lots of emotional care. As part of our adoption process, Ashley and I have created a website and Facebook page where birth mothers can find out more about us; our story, as well as contact info for our adoption agency (see the attached card). Please note, it's absolutely necessary for both us and the birth mother that we keep confidential our identities and therefore ask that you don't pass along our contact information, just the websites. If you know of someone considering adoption, please keep Ashley and I in mind and pass along our website information. Thank you so much! - Kris

WE ARE NOW OFFICALLY APPROVED AND WAITING!  We received our certificate in the mail this week and we are approved to adopt!  Thank you all from the bottom of our hearts for your love and support of us these last four months.  They have been trying and stressful times, but we can say honestly that this process has been rewarding and now we walk away with many special gifts we wouldn't otherwise have.  Now, we just sit back and enjoy our life especially all the things we can still do before we bring home our baby.  Our goal is to live everyday as we normally would and wait for the one phone call that will change our lives forever.

Gotta practice somehow...

Oskar was cold, so I swaddled him.



And he liked it!



 So much so that I couldn't get him to leave the bed...

And then there is George.  He was eager to try out the stoller the day we got it!  Just kidding.
(excuse the terrible picture)

Lucky for me, my boys are good sports and will do just about anything I put them up to.

Happy Friday!